Friday, April 10, 2020

Tears

I’m so tired. 
I’m tired of being home. I’m tired of not seeing my friends and family. I’m tired of not having anything to look forward to. I’m tired of seeing my kids ALL DAY EVERY DAY. I’m tired of being grubby all the time and not having any real reason to get ready. I’m tired of this feeling. I’m tired of feeling mostly sad all day without my friends. 
I’m such an extrovert. This quarantine mess has really got me down. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not depressed. But this is for the birds. I need my girlfriends. I need my mama. I need my Mexican food!!!
I need reasons to go somewhere “essential.”  If I don’t start getting out of this house regularly there will be more tears. Today at lunch I was draining the goop off the top of my dip...you know, when it’s already been opened and there’s goop on top. I tipped my French onion dip over the sink to drain it and the whole dang tub of dip plopped into the sink. 
😭😭😭😭😭
I for real cried. I’m not even sorry about it. It’s not just that my dip fell in the sink, I salvaged what I could and ate it with lunch. It’s just everything,  you know. It’s so hard to keep the kids away from the neighbors. It’s so hard to be here for them to talk to NON STOP all day. It’s so hard to feed them sooooo many times a day, a week?! Gosh the food. 
It’s just hard. So I cried. It doesn’t seem like it’s gonna get better anytime soon either. So if you’re out there crying too, just know you’re not alone. 
Easter sure is different this year. But I know Sunday’s still coming...and Jesus is alive!!! 

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